Pudding

A week ago today, I met with Bill Horne & Jay Harvey at the vet school. I know I've been remiss in posting the outcome of The Big Meeting. I've pulled up this blog site innumerable times, and each time I have, I've been incapable - literally - of updating it. I'm still not certain why.

In part it's because I'm waiting.

I was pleasantly surprised at Dr. Horne's seeming honesty. I cannot stop from interjecting the descriptor 'seeming.' Perhaps I am too jaded and cynical -- left over doubts from my work in animal rescue and Corporate America.

Horne showed me the paperwork where it was clearly written that I had indicated The White Dog should be euthanized if she needed a complex GI surgery. On one hand, I am thrilled and happy beyond description that my PTS order was overlooked? Over-ridden?

Nonetheless, that stark, brutal word 'euthanize' screamed up from the paperwork.

To a certain extent, I feel vindicated. Two plus months of wrangling to find that I actually am not crazy (at least about this). I had, indeed, communicated clearly. So clearly, in fact, that the intake doc had used that lethal word.

Somewhere, in the '15 levels of communication' that get involved at Cornell, my intent had gotten distorted, transposed, ignored. (15 layers at 2:30 in the morning? The intake vet told me he was speaking "directly" with the surgeon.) It's not my responsibility to figure out where the message got lost (and I suspect the vet school won't spend any time figuring this out, either), but the fact it did reflects poorly on the school.

The bottom line is this: I am willing to pay for half of the bill. Cornell is responsible for the other half. Horne agreed to this. I'm waiting to see when (if) that is reflected on my Discover statement.

Horne also offered to have The White Dog treated by the gastro-enterologists for the intermittent diarrhea she's had. And that if she had another case of intussception again, Cornell would do the surgery gratis.

The proof is in the pudding..... (so, where's the pudding? Ah, I am truly jaded & cynical.)

I also received a stiff, unhappily offered apology from Dr. Jay Harvey. I am certain it was very difficult for him to apologize. I also feel as if he could have easily made use of the phone or snail mail to have contacted me during the two months that elapsed between our phone conversation and the meeting. How he acted during that conversation was grossly unprofessional.

His side of the story. The young student shows up on rounds, crying uncontrollably. When asked, she states 'a client (yours truly) just abused me on the phone.' Another student pipes up 'clients abuse us *a lot.*'

So, when Harvey -- who tells me he has a daughter -- picks up the telephone, he is in attack ('defense') mode.

I am still flummoxed by this. It's another reason I've been unable to post about the meeting. Abuse? ABUSE? If what I said was abusive, then how would that student categorize how Dr. Harvey spoke to me during our heated exchange?

An explanation: a gzillion years ago, when I worked for the international arm of that Fortune 5 company, I used my own version of shorthand when I was speaking with overseas contacts. Someone who understands real shorthand would look at my scribblings and grimace. My version, however, stood me in good stead for my 13+ years in Corporate America.

In June, suspecting that the White Dog Situation would escalate, I took notes on the conversations I had with Cornell personnel as well as the messages I left.

When I returned to my office after the meeting, I pulled out my notes on the conversation I had with the student. I did not pull any punches. I'm sure my voice was raised. I can also guarantee that I did not swear at, threaten, or in any way abuse her. In fact, I said 'I know you just happen to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. I know that you are just the representative of the vet school. I know this is not your responsibility.'

Somehow, intensity, honesty and directness got interpreted as 'abuse.'

Apparently, the young woman was so distraught she was crying uncontrollably. Apparently, no one could get her to stop. In fact, she was sent home, and one of her rotation mates was sent over later to check on her. She, allegedly, was still shaky and unsettled the next day, because of how abusive I was. All this despite the fact I rung her early that afternoon, and apologized for my intensity.

When I heard Harvey's opening lines to our conversation -- which were, far and away more offensive than anything I said to this student -- I wasn't thinking 'this guy is abusing me.' I was thinking 'this guy is a jerk.'

What will that student do when she does get abused? I don't know how to interpret her reaction. She has 'excellent communication skills' and has been commended for them by vet school personnel. I don't understand her meltdown. She turned into a quivering heap of, well, pudding.

So. When I checked my Discover account on-line this evening, the credit from the vet school had not yet appeared. And I still don't know how to process the information that I received on how that student reacted to my direct, honest comments.

The White Dog is fine. She's bouncy, happy, getting into *everything* and apparently healthy. Good thing (nay, an excellent thing) those vets didn't listen to this caretaker!

Note: added the morning of Friday, August 27: I do believe that Horne will have a refund processed. Early on, I made a silent commitment that should I get a refund, that amount would donated to animal rescue.